Sagging
At some point in one’s life, things will begin to sag. Bags and sags in your face may send you to someone for injections of youth treatment or some surgical lifting of certain parts of your body that the years and gravity are moving in a southerly direction . Pull, tug, inject and like magic, the years seem to disappear, at least on the outside. But that’s NOT what I’m really talking about in this entry.
Instead, what I’m referring to is the practice of wearing your pants with the waistline closer to your knees than to your waist. Where did all this start and why does the popularity of this “fashion statement” continue? Guys in my generation, the seniors, tend to choose suspenders to hold their pants up when their buttocks have seemingly disappeared totally and left them with a size 52 belly looming over a size 34 waist. You’ve seen it. I know you have. But I understand that the whole concept of sagging was spawned in the correctional facilities of this great country and has something to do with being incarcerated and not having, or being allowed to have a belt to hold your pants up where it was designed to be worn. Is that right? I’m not sure. However, for the life of me, I don’t get it because the practice of sagging totally defies logic. It would seem to me that you either have to choose a wider gait to keep your pants at a certain level or (as I have see), hold your pants up with one hand. What the hell does logic have to do with it, you say? How cool is it to wear your pants half way down halfway to your knees with your underwear exposed? I know it’s a matter of personal choice. I’m just an observer and if you want to wear your pants that way, that’s your business and I certainly won’t and don’t have a problem with it. But what if you’re just doing it because your friends do it and you want to fit in? Are you going to be ridiculed for wearing a belt? I submit that one would not be able to run very fast, carry more than one drink at a time or go without underwear if sagging is your “thing”. Do you purposely buy your pants two sizes too big at the store and if you happen to gain enough weight and the pants are too tight to sag, do you just throw them out and buy another oversized pair? If you’re righthanded, can you still hold your pants up with your left hand? Legally? If I’m “sagging” and I get stopped by the man-in-blue, can I get away with just putting one hand behind my head or back? And do I get extra “cool” points if I buy my pants, not only two sizes too big but with rips and tears in them, as well? Just wondering!